People Say The Most Stupid Things

People Say The Most Stupid Things

Stupid Things

Even the title could cause an argument about grammar.

To settle any confusion, ‘most stupid’ is used by those of us who like to stick to the older rules of superlatives.  Anything more than one syllable sounds wrong when you put ‘est’ or ‘er’ on the end but I’m fine with ‘stupidest’ or ‘stupider’.

I’ve used both and will continue to do so to a certain extent.

Today’s post, however, is about those silly things, mostly idioms, we say, read and write without  stopping to consider the meaning of them.

We blurt out ridiculous phrases with no thought as to what they mean or how confusing, and even funny, they might sound.

Here are some of the more humorous things I’ve read lately:

A Handful of People

As in ‘only a handful of people turned up’.

Were they very small people or did the author have very large hands?

In what universe could you ever have a handful of people? Yet this is such a common expression.

Remember that old American sci-fi show, Land of the Giants? I think I saw a handful of people on there.

Room Temperature

Not so much silly as misleading.

This is supposedly a temperature – not too hot, not too cold – to serve certain cheeses and wines, among other things.

I don’t know about you but in my house the temperature of the room is often very close to the outside temperature.

In summer, the cheese would have melted and the wine would be hot – that’s not what you want.

And in winter they’d be half-frozen.

I’d love to keep my butter at room temperature but at certain times of the year it just isn’t practical.

Moreover, no one in Australia would serve wine at room temperature in summer.

Perhaps this is an expression from countries with a milder climate, or where indoor climate control is the norm.

Waiting For The Other Shoe To Drop

A common saying suggesting one is waiting for an inevitable but unpleasant event to happen based on something that’s recently happened.

I can’t help but wonder how long they’d be waiting if the dropper of the first shoe had only one foot, had an injury that prevented them from wearing one of their shoes, or had lost a shoe.

They may have been hit by a car at an intersection and a shoe flew off, or perhaps they were chased or mugged and lost a shoe in the struggle.

I know there’s a logical explanation behind the saying but it still makes me smile and ponder alternative scenarios.

More … Than You Can Shake a Stick At

You can fill in the blank with any quantity of anything but presumably a number of anythings too big to count.

Because everyone knows you can’t shake a stick at a small number, or any number you can count quicker than the time it takes to shake a stick at it.

I don’t know the origins of this idiom but it’s a perfect example of the point I’m trying to make here.

It’s silly, and you risk subjecting yourself to ridicule if you say it and anyone bothers to listen.

For the record, I can shake a stick at any number of anything with no trouble, but maybe that’s just me.

You Made Your Bed Now Lie In It

Another expression that doesn’t stand up to further scrutiny.

We all know what it means but has anyone stopped to consider that beds are traditionally made every day?

Wouldn’t that suggest whoever has to lie in the bed they made could just make it more to their liking the next day?

Why wait until the next day? Why not get out of the bed and re-make it right now? Who wants to sleep in a badly made uncomfortable bed all night?

I’m also pretty sure some people don’t even make their bed before they lie in it.

What does that say about them?

The Cost Of Living

We all know the cost of living keeps rising but no matter how expensive it gets it’s still more popular than the alternative.

I guess anyone can increase their prices and blame it on the cost of living.

Even though being dead lasts a lot longer than being alive the cost of living is much higher than the cost of dying.

Can funeral parlours increase their prices and blame it on the cost of living?

And why does no one complain about the cost of dying? Is it because you only die once?

Isn’t there another popular expression  – You Only Live Once?



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